Budget WTF 2009 关我燃事 *yawn*

BUDGET AND THE PEOPLE woh....

Agriculture - RM5.6B incentive to growers
关我燃事*yawn* nothing to do with me

Alternative Engery - Tax examption for Hybrid cars
关我燃事*yawn* nothing to do with me

School - upgrade politech, build primary/secondary schools
关我燃事*yawn* nothing to do with me

medical - tax exemption on bomoh treatments
关我燃事*yawn* nothing to do with me

poor/disabled - given chicken feet subsidies
关我燃事*yawn* nothing to do with me

police - RM220M build more headquarters
关我燃事*yawn* nothing to do with me

Income Tax - RM50 bux better, 1% lower
关我燃事*yawn* nothing to do with me

LRT - improve damansara, cheras, kelana
关我燃事*yawn* nothing to do with me

Bus/Taxi - reduce road tax
关我燃事*yawn* nothing to do with me

Hotel - melacca/penang/east malaysia 4&5 stars
关我燃事*yawn* nothing to do with me

mahai.... who did this proposal? some drop outs from kindergarten?

why the fuck call it Budget and the PEOPLE since it is so irrelevant to me.

Their GuGuJiao Got Stuck

when i was young i always think why the penis shaped like a turtle head with a notch between the tip and the shaft. but i didn't pursue any further to get the answer because i realise not many women care about this chinese phisiology distinctivness especailly the whole dick only about 3'' length. but someone found a better way to utlise this little kink tryin to fit a ring over it ended up having the gugu stuck then cried for help. later after tried all means to remove the ring by pull, push, suck, WD40 and testicle pulling, bomba resolved by having it cut - it as in the ring. this incident of ''cock of the ring'' drama ended up with series of historical laughter and aeroplane's blogging.

but apparently we have another asian sohai lagi cialat tried to fuck the chair in a park at 4am, ended up his his weiner was stuffed through the steel plate's hole and got strended, later he had no choice called for help and then surraoudned by journalists, fire fighters and medical personels. according to the report, it was because the gugu expanded after he shroved it through the hole. docotr say if 1 more hour his johnny could have died of nill blood circulation.

besides laughter and non-stop of tew na xing over these 2 sohais, i do have to do something about this incident and play my 2.5 cents worth of effort to educate the community. therefore i decided to blog the shit out of these dick-jokes and honor them with as the "cock of the ring" and"chair fucker" of the year.

Euphoria The Ministry of Emptiness

well, as much anticipated and spoke about latest clubbing spot the MOS Euphoria fuck shit thing in town, apparently it is no good fuzz and really a big joke in the industry. what are their unique selling points? 1. in wrong place subang with college student's spending power 2. charging cover charge at RM50 per head 3. each bottle is limited to three entries 4. chivas was sold at four hundred over bux. do that work? i dont know, let's see..


.OMG..... friday night 10pm it looks like this.....

ah well, maybe i'm just too picky, they do have something cool worth to visit this place geh.. the toilet signage is funny - so go ahead pay RM50 to enter to see this.

I'm Najib, Not Altuntaya!!!!

Olympic Myth - Why Diver Shower in Public

1. Chiese government over spent, so cut cost to build a wall
2. Because Chinese are used to 何屎shit in public , so similarly shower in public is no big deal.
3. Sponsors insisted so that their brands are on air for longer , keep TV audience busy and juiced up
4. wash off chlorines in the water (as if shower tap dont have..tew)
5. NBC added "they (divers) want to have some fun"

the answer is - to maintain diver's body temperature, its about 27 C in the pool and around 22C out there (perhaps wet bulb), it can prepare them for better muscle activities before next dive.

damn.. never blogged such serious shit before.


source:
http://sports.yahoo.com/olympics/beijing/
http://club.comment.2008.sohu.com

Accountant Buruk!!!

Ugly Flower

[10:46] Fuzzy: wow the photo so prettyvery beautiful woh

[10:47] nancy: which 1??

[10:47] Fuzzy: offcourse the flower,

[10:48] Fuzzy: u should stand a side, you make the flower so ugly joh.

[10:48] nancy: cheh

[10:48] nancy: haha

[10:48] nancy: u so bad!!!

Get Rid of Coins

my late father didn't leave behind any fortune nor fame to me and yes i still working my ass off to pay for my living. therefore i have no regret drugging him to death. but its OK, history is history, i gotta move on in my life and see what else i can do to make some extra money for pussies and beer. and i decided to go home korek here and there to find out see how much money i can make changing all the coins in my house, my car and my maid's underwear. so i manage to get a box full of them the first round.

since i pass by rest area every now and then. so i decided to ask if one of the shop owner wants my coin, he fucked so happy about my offer and wants all of em.. except 1 cents, which i understand. well, what the fuck, nevermind. so how much this little box worth? after we stack up the coins and separate them by their face values, ain't too bad. this fuck box manage to totaled up RM 105. the fella was damn happy and give me the money in no time and reminded me to go back to him if i got more.

why are they so happy about it? i guess because according to these hawkers, bank charges them % of the change as commission, run man also on and off drop by their shops to offer the same as me, except these people already separated these coins in nice stacks wrapped in plastics, similarly they charge some commissions on this service. according to them, hypermarkets used to collect 1 cents coin from public if u caring a bag loads of them, even if they still do that, unfortunately 1 cents are getting phased out soon, so i doubt people will wants it. in fact just like us, we are trying to get rid of them. so, not bad if u want so extra money next time, dig hard and u can get some fast cash :)

Mysterious Claypot Rice Man

if u happens to pass by this secretive busy street of seri petaling near the Telekom tower, check out a very rundown tulan shop with a furious looking dark skinned man making clay pot rice. I'm not a food fanatic and i ain't provoking his food because he ain't paying me no shit about blogging em. About something i never understand and unable to find out after staying here more than a decade. i really want to know their etchnic group.



the couple speaks very fluent Cantonese, and his wife carries truck loads of jeweleries on her, she has perfect ass and huge tits bigger than the clay pot each, her make up is so thick at least add up to around half a kilo excluding eyelashes. my first time gone there i spoke Malay with the guy and he furiously replied me in Cantonese and i was fucked embarrassed. the legend says that they were Indonesians which i believe, because listen carefully they do have that sort of indon accent.



lastly i just want to say, every time there are about 100 clay pots laying on the floor waiting to be washed. so that roughly explains how much these couple is making. 1 pot is RM4.50, 1 Assam fish is RM3.00. IRB, pls tax them. :)

A Pussy Won Silver Medal

FUZZY says: what do you think of the Malaysian Vs China pingpong game yesterday Final?
CINDY says: I thought it is Singapore vs China in ping pong?
FUZZY says: our national player la my dear Lee Cong wei vs China Lin Dan
CINDY says: that's badminton lah not ping pong
FUZZY says: u must be joking. the way lee cong we played is not badminton. it's pingpong.
CINDY says: ha ha. I think he is very nervous and under great stress. made lots of mistake.
FUZZY says: if nervous then dont go olympic, stay home play Nitendo.
CINDY says: but Lin Dan in top form. Very difficult to beat lah. If the game not in China, maybe lee can do better. less disturbance. we are still human, once in a while still subject on all the emotional stuff lah don't be too harsh
FUZZY says: yea i agree, maybe lee cong wei if play in highschool competition he will be able to perform
CINDY says: like you can do better than him meh


FUZZY says: if he has emotion, then should use Intimate or Kotex, not spending my money go China and come back n get married
CINDY says: I never expect him to win gold anyway. silver is good enough. coz he is still world no.2 not no.1
FUZZY says: RM300,000 right? not bad also
CINDY says: at least we have medal this time, not like sydney
ok lah.
FUZZY says: yesterday everyone fucked this tew that. i think the Negative Chi travelled to Beijing and really haunted him
CINDY says: ya lahh
FUZZY says: sommore everyone expecting national holiday tim
CINDY says: ai yah so high expectation. i didn't expect he wins so its ok.he made lots of silly mistakes.but he is not good enough to win though
FUZZY says: obviously.... so when do u think we will win gold medal?
CINDY says: when we have chinese playing for us?
FUZZY says: u think our govenrment can pay betteR? we are using ex players whom were equally weak and lame losing all the games during their time.
CINDY says: If they want gold desperate enough, then they have to pay
FUZZY says: i cannot believe it why bankrupts will be engaged to coach the national badminton player.


CINDY says: that's financial issue, I think he still have the talent in badminton. but since that we never have the experience to win gold and our coach also never done it before. How can our players win gold?
FUZZY says: suddenly u are so smart
CINDY says: So we must have winning formula first lah.
FUZZY says: what u eat this morning?
CINDY says: just got my coffee dose.
FUZZY says: that already make u smarter than most of the people in the ministry
CINDY says: ha ha. what to do kena jaga muka lah
FUZZY says: they should hire u as De Facto adviser neh. then u be the first to manage bring LV and GUCCI to sponsor our badminton player. and they will get some BURBERRY shoe tim
CINDY says: most of them are just comparing with themselves. too scare to compare with world class champion

Wild Sex Cheating Magazine

oh my... who can resist not to pick this magazine up and check out what the fuck is about Wild Sex and it says "seduce her in under 2 Seconds"..

kanasai, must be some horny kungfu big time

chick picking taichi master karmasutera tricks.

let me see

page 159

here we go

Tew ...

Why I like Convertible Cars?

i always liked convertibles, they are sexy, cool and reveals ur sense of richness without doubt. when u drive a convertible under a hot sun wearing gucci sunglasses, man, that's a certain damn bitch horning act of marcho and whores will jump into ur car n u will get laid in no time. look at the crowd at midvalley lining up to rape her!



this new Mazda MX-5 roadster the decendants on the all mighty earlier soft topped Mazda Roadster. the key changes they made to this car is the HARD TOP automatic sunroof! wala. this fucker costs Rm 219,000 slighly cheaper than BMW 3 or Benz C class. so you make a choice.

as for me

personally

its my dream

to own a convirtible

so that

i can

drive naked on it

Illegal Parking Assholes

i do agree with the fucking useless council's idea to install metering machines in my Taman area when all of us are in the midst of poverty fronting the everexpensive oil prices that none of us can afford to buy expensive stuffs and have to eat shitty food most of the time. tew them!

ut besides protesting against the council, i also want to protest agains hum ka lings who trying to BOOK parking space at their shop fronts as if they owned teh fucking bay forgetting I too paid taxes to enjoy public facilities - Dear Auhtorities, fuck fine these people to make money instead of juicing my hard earn money !!

She Wants to Kill Me

sometimes i just don't understand woman, i kept telling Jessie i never slept with Cindy and the stain on my pants were spilt barley panas instead *ahem* juice. she was quite mad and seems hard to convince her i will never betray an ugly and furious girlfriend like her even i get horned by bitches of triple D cup size tits. the next day she was totally changed, and made me some breakfast the first time in our relationship since last week we first met at the brothel.

wait a minute, something is fishy because my testicle shrinks every time danger is ahead of me. the snack was opened, and the cap was cracked.... i can smell evil , i am expecting vengeance camouflaged on still water. i started to remember last word of my late grandfather before we bury him alive, he said never trust woman who makes u breakfast on the following day after she was pretty pissed of by you.

so i decided to test these suspicious food, and i took a piece of this evil biscuit and give it to a pussy cat , and damn fucked she didn't even want to eat it - apparently it is stained or poisoned. then i poured out the herbal soup from the bottle and i found it to be corrosive! look at the drain, made a hole in the concrete floor!!

i am thinking hard what have i done wrong to deserve such treatment. i have never betrayed any woman in my life and remained faithful to every bitch i ever dated every fortnightly. Am I a total jack ass? now i have finally decided to break up with Jane and Lucy, and i should love Mandy more than Cammy, farewell my love, please go to tong sampah along with your poison biscuit.

Tambah Telur Culture

"abang, nasi lemak satu peck ada telur mia..."

"Big Breakfast meal with egg pls ..."

"Boss, Maggie mee goereng tambah Telur..."

"Ah Neh, Mee Hoon Tambah Telur..."

"taukeh, Rendang ayam ambah Telur..."

"Roti Sardin satu..."

.

.

.

.

.

.

.
-_-"

.

.
ma hai.....

got people serve like this meh?

Cari Makan Rm5.5 million

lately the TV channel has lots of programs on food hunting, like Ho ciak, 吃尽天下，Jiak Sai and so forth. these are certainly good programs for our glutiness, however will be too bad and painful for our wallets and butt hole.

but lately i found out there is a kind of cari makan thing that you do that worth a million, infact millions. this whore get married to a sohai and somehow didnt work out and she may win a case getting RM5.5million - i call that truely King of Cari-makan-ism.

but it seems only can ever happens to woman with big tits, can i try to get married to some bitch and later getting paid RM5.5million?

hey rich ladies, can you marry me?

Lie of Beautiful Lie

the song is full of energy and meaning. it talks about the falsies of phantom goals that modern us are seeking after blindly without purpose. it uses the Antarctica as a perfect illustration of the falsified beauty of the actions of mankind, shade away the truth of disasters beneath urbanization and modern promises.





it says :"I'm running around in circles, baby A quiet desperation's building higher, I've got to remember this is just a game " - 3o sec to Mars "Beautiful Lie". this is a great song with purpose, with energy and educative. after listening to this song, i feel some changes in my life, i need to do something about this song, maybe i need to blog about it and share this spirit to more people.





yes. its right, everything is bunch of lies, we shall be awaken.....(you can sense some aeroplane shit is coming up ) .... and yes, the fuckest lie is ...... how the fuck these assholes get power supply to jam their guitars? plug the wire into your asshole ah? MTV always think we are sohai. btw, sometimes i think how many drugs and pussies they have fucked before these rock start write and sing about world peace or save the planet.

She Died, He's Sorry

i've had stupid female friends, but off course, i have more stupider male friends who think they can cheat women to bed by hanging around the clubs flashing their rolex and ordering big bill drinks driving hot convertible sport cars. you think you can get laid just by showing off such materialistic facade of your life? thats bullshit and women certainly will not fall into you. women wants different things to get cheated, only three things and u will score big time - flirt on facebook, spam her with horny emails and try to look cool.

the newspaper say he's an internet predator, and His friend defended him saying he is not. And off course, naturally the surviving man of such tragedy will often become the central of condemnation and tews. i just don't understand, maybe i am really that ugly and lame and victim of over masturbation, i never had free muffs or blow job from any lady, let alone say a hot babe from Indonesia staying in Mt. Kiara.

anyway, it is over, someone died, someone say he is sorry. the mother said this

what about all of us here? not sure about you, but i'm practicing hard to learn to write emails to women like Jack Ho does. maybe i'll get lucky.

http://www.malaysianbar.org.my/legal/general_news/
mont_kiara_tragedy_parents_blame_internet_predator.html

WTF 羊腩粉Mutton Brisket Noodle ?!

i had mutton, i had soup, i had beef Brisket noodle, i had hainanese breast milk too. and certainly Hainanese Lamb Brisket Soup Noodle 羊腩粉is first on this planet. i promised my self since my father died of heroine overdose, i will never eat livers or shit tube (intestines) needless o mention brisket noodle - fuck poisonous junk food invented by selfish Chinese to kill other Chinese.

so i ordered a signature dish, it taste just like common beef version of 牛腩粉, comes in dry or moist version, depends if u have skipped the foreplay. has lots of union and kacang on it along with piles of lamb organs submerged in thick soup. taste wise is unique, it has that kind of strong mutton fragrant that annoys most women, especially the small tits ones. the same shop too selling lots of other dishes and it's 4 months old only. the lady boss is pretty and i always have fetish fantasies on women carrying fake LV pouch.

good luck and give it a try! you may be next victim of food poisoning. oh ya, where is it? seremban, Taman AST, 10 min from Labu Tol plaza. not gonna free ad for them, just dont go search for it urself, if u are lazy go McD, ain't give a shit. :)

RM13.8 Fish Head Noodle?!

well, the last time i ever had expensive Sang Har Mee was in the Bangsar fuckign Shopping Mall's Chinese restaurant Ming's Palace, where it costs me around RM28 per bowl (not sure same price not). so then been getting lots of friend telling me near my house got this super duper mega lunsi good taste food, so i decided give it a try and hunt for it. it's called AH SOON's RIP OFF FISH HEAD MEE. near this kuchai entrepreneur park, and u better go early, often packed with people.

looks good right? off course hell not, don't discount the taste because of a fucked up camera man does this picture. but anyway i don't have to beautify it to make this shit bowl looks more photogenic, it is as how it was placed on my table by the poor mannered lanjiao workers there. anyway, i aint here to get angry but to try out this RM13.80 signature food. there are few cool stuff about this crap, 1st is they put a decent sized prawn and charge u extra RM7 for it, if not the ordinary fish head noodle just cost u RM6.80 if i am not mistaken. 2ndly the soup is really nice, and can tell it's well seasoned and contented with mysterious unknown spices besides ajinomoto.

give it a try, looks good, taste good and price is - ok la . but warn ya, as usual Chinese shops like this have no idea what the fuck their signboard is about, the logo is "WINSON CAFE" as in ah soon gua, but the english name is "Restoran Ah Soon Fish Head Mee" and Chinese is "Ah Soon Sang Har Yu Tao Mee Hoon"

good luck, if u can find the place, and if u can get a seat.

Wake Up Bro, MRR2 Crack Again Joh

I Bought Nano I Bought Shuffle

oil price increases, mamak food also getting expensive and latest news is subang's association of kopitiam too decided to increase prices of all the roti, telur and drinks. so let us not to spend money on unnecessary thingss, be prudent, save money, especially lavish lifestyles needs to be controlled and use jusco plastic bag rather than condom. under such economy turmoil, i have decided control my spending and only buy things that are necessary.


i bought both Nano and shuffle yesterday. one is for my bedtime or travelling on trishore to office and another i can use it while I'm doing workout or getting a blowjob from Mary. i have actually done lots of research about the pro and con on these two, but basically i am a busy person and find it cumbersome to think too much. so i decided to sell my Zen, N82, M1412 laptop and W810i phone and get these two for fun and lavish sake. so what about them?


synchronising both of them in 1 PC is proven no issue, both devices shown up on screen and just a drag n drop thing - it took me quite a while to get used to this shitty thing as i always got problem understanding what are "library" "play list" and all the "i"- Apple jargon. as for the devices, basically Shuffle is certainly cheaper and for budget purchaser is good deal, especially its only 2GB RM280 bux compare to 4GB RM580 for the Nano. but after using it a while i find that 2GB Shuffle is actually nonsense and a purchase of stupidity. because there is no screen for u to see, and 2GB is enough to house 400 songs roughly and how the hell are u going to look up for ur song? so seriously 1GB Shuffle at RM 180 is better deal (anyone wants to buy from me?) . overall, shuffle is cheap and cheerful, good battery lifespan and handy, come to think about it, looks like is smaller than my testicle (one).


as for the Nano, i think it's really a better buy if u are as rich as me and money is not an issue. it does high volume of MP3 and Movie storage, can store Lyrics, categorization and graphic interface control is just superb, needless to mention the battery life, design is just too perfect. worth every cents u paid for it. obviously u can tell dinosaur age people like me getting amused by this 1 year old technology and blogging about it is really a big joke. but its quite good price i guess for now, except these fuckers' accessories ain't cheap, how i know? coz i bought whole lots of them. just radio the FM shit already RM210 bux.


the Nano is so small and fits into my 501 coin pocket, it tends to get little bit warm and therefore i don't think it's good to wrap it up with the sleeves or wallets, the stainless steel back is good to look at my own ass face. so all in all i'm lovin it, more than blow job from Paris Hilton. for RM 580 bux i wouldn't even trade it for one night sex with Saiful, and yes, next task is to ebay some cheaper accessories. if i stop blogging a while later maybe is due to crashing into longkang because its damn too fun fiddling the song lists on the ipod :)

Take Leave Call Chicken

[16: 32] JackAss: Boulevard Hotel got offer now, 1 hour massage by A girl + 1 session of boom boom by B girl, RM 250 saja, value for money man. Unless for expensive place like Oasis, u have to look for Apple, Melody and Kelly. they are top whores.
[16: 32] Innocent: u have their numbers or not? Apple, sounds cute
[16: 33] JackAss: no la. go there and ''order"" , don’t get number la. Dangerous, how u gonna save spa girl number in your phone? sure knea find out by girlfriend.
[16: 37] Innocent: HAHAHA, someday la. Let’s go. ask Mofo also.
[16: 45] JackAss: nia mah, u both regular too?

[16: 45] Innocent: HAHA, no comment, lol
[16: 45] JackAss: or never been so asking me to tour guide ah?
[16: 46] Innocent: hahahaha
[16: 46] JackAss: if u want cheaper also got geh, Oscar in in Mentari, then Grade hotel in Old klang road, but mostly china girl.

[16: 47] Innocent: later kena police raid, tew already
[16: 47] JackAss: oh no worry, normally they let the 'customer' go out one, thts why u see paper only girls photo taken ma,this country is very fair to fuckers one
[16: 48] Innocent: haha, u kena raid before or nt
[16: 48] JackAss: so far nope, but no worryi teach u when police is raiding ,some otherday teach u
[16: 50] Innocent: faster say, lol
[16: 51] JackAss: there is always a light at the ceiling which is not lighted, it is not rosak
[16: 51] Innocent: then?
[16: 51] JackAss: just that when got raid, it will lighted up, so then u better put ur pants on and pretend taking a shower
[16: 52] Innocent: lol
[16: 52] JackAss: if u happens to have a erected penis. ask bite ur self and make it flaccid
[16: 52] Innocent: why dont u ask the girl to blow you and just cum, lol
[16: 54] JackAss: woah. well.. how can u cum when u know police is downstairs trying to break in
[16: 55] Innocent: straight away flaccid la, scared like shit, lol

[16: 55] JackAss: so this lesson will cost u 1 jug of beer man, its bad karma not paying prostitute after having sex,
[16: 56] Innocent: hahaha
[16: 56] JackAss: also bad karma not paying pimp after teaching u where to get laid
[16: 56] Innocent: HAHAHA, COME LAH, when
[16: 56] JackAss: when will your girlfriend come back.
[16: 56] Innocent: 14th
[16: 57] JackAss: aiya. tapi working hours how to get MoFo out, he cannot ular mah
[16: 57] Innocent: i also, lol
[16: 57] JackAss: ok. that means have to be evening after work
[16: 57] Innocent: yup
[16: 57] JackAss: still ok geh. same price anyway
[16: 58] Innocent: but evening already "dirty" lah, so many clients already
[16: 58] JackAss: wah, so choosy, might as well go line up before start business la. like buy madonna concert ticket like tat

[16: 58] Innocent: lol, u check with Mofo see when he free
[17: 00] JackAss: ok. ask him take leave , reason put in the leave form "go call chicken". actually no worry loh. ask the OKT "ei, brudder, got any un-used today ah?"
[17: 00] Innocent: what is OKT, lol
[17: 01] JackAss: OKT - pimp - turtle head, alrighty pal. 5pm liao. have to go mabuk now. we'll talk about fuck program next time ok, u just practice TFK at home first for the time being
[17: 02] Innocent: hagaagag

Want Play My Maid?

just hired a maid and i decided to fire her the next day

because she's been attracting lots of "no 3 no 4"
(as in nonsense) people to my house.
not because she got hot look or big tits
and obviously no one would like to make love to her
unless in real desperation and 'hands are tight'


I think is because her sense of
fashion is seducive.